Mommy Dearest

Your mother, my queen.

My bones tremble at the thought of the woman you call mommy being my wife. You have inherited traits of royalty so please bear with me as I get my words and thoughts together.

The super woman you see your mom to be day in and day out is exactly who she’s been from the day I met her. It wouldn’t seem like she’s a superhero at first glance but your mom is a very interesting individual to say the least. Mommy has been a pivotal figure to many people in her life in more ways than she can imagine which is why I want to give you some quick facts about the lady that tucks you in at night. Your mother isn’t just an iconic boo boo kisser oh no no no,she is a phenomenal woman that is able to do anything she puts her mind too.

I can remember vividly talking about our goals for the future, the way your mom’s eyes lit up was phenomenal. What mommy is doing now is exactly what she said she would. I honestly work harder because I know mommy would never make excuses about pursuing her dreams. She has a trait about her that is very attractive, a trait your grandmother has as well. They never complain, they’re truly grateful because they know where they’ve been.

I never understood how hard mommy worked until a few years into our friendship. I knew she worked hard but it was her consistency that highlighted how disciplined she was and still is. Think about it for a second, do you ever wonder how mommy has you in bed by 8:30 pm every night, up at 6:00 am every morning? Your clothes ready to go to school, your breakfast and lunch both waiting for you at the table and a smile on her face? Mommy is an alien!! Just kidding but I want you to grasp that mommy is world class individual. I want you to notice the things about mommy that the world will forget.

At a young age I took certain things for granted because my perceptions were focused on one element of mommy, which I had a hard time understanding. I’m glad I didn’t stay in that place of confusion, another man probably would be writing this for mommy.

Besides her work ethic, mommy is a therapist. She is a mediator to a group of beautiful black women that will help raise you. I wish you could see your mom in action, it’s amazing to see what she is capable of, and soon enough you’ll get a taste of it. She is just a splendid person to be around which is why she is the go to person in anyone’s time of need. Mommy wholeheartedly embodies traits of God that she demonstrates everyday. Honestly, I believe mommy is capable of moon walking on water but she thinks I’m delusional. She maybe right.

She exudes abundance for the people close to her. In some of the most difficult situations,she demonstrates poise and calculated decision making. A straight shooter. Your mother is a superstar. If you ever wanted to know what perfection is, look at mommy. Want to know a secret ? You want to know why I married mommy? Of course, mommy’s amazing looks is what caught my eye, just look at how flawless you look. Who do you think you get your beauty from? ( it’s me but I’ll let her have this one )It was her friendship. Moms friendship is what always made me feel like she was the one. We have always been friends through some of the craziest battles( mostly sparked because of daddy). A true friend is hard to come by, but if you manage to make your best friend your significant other you are in for the ride of your life.

All jokes aside, mommy has transformed my life in more ways than I can be grateful for. She sincerely is an image of what God intended the world to be…Effortless. So whenever you have the opportunity, make sure you kiss her on the cheek and thank her for everything she embodies.

With Love

See I got demons in my past, so I got daughters on the way” Jay-Z. A line so simple had the power to rattle most men to depths of their core, I was no different. One day I hope to speak to you about my past, and cut your learning curve in half.

To my beautiful princess,

I wanted to take some time out to talk to you about your grandpa. I chose today because his birthday recently passed and I started reminiscing on my time with him growing up. The older I’ve gotten, the more I’ve noticed different forms of love that I wasn’t always conscious of as a teenager that ultimately hindered the growth of our relationship. Ironically enough, it’s clear as day to me now what it was that he was trying to accomplish.

He was honestly my first hero as a child. He may not know this, but I used to like him more than I liked your grandma. I can remember as clear as day random times before your uncle was born where I would get in trouble for God knows what and end up running to him for protection. And like clockwork, he was always there to save me when grandma was chasing me down with her slippers ( grandma was a tough lady). Then one day, that all changed. I don’t remember what I did this particular time but what was once my safe haven suddenly turned into a double-team wrestling match. For a lack of better words, your grandparents tore me up. From then on, my relationship with your grandpa was never the same.

As I child , I had a very good understanding of hard work. I saw your grandparents work their butts off just to make sure your uncle and I were taken care of, but that definitive line of hard work quickly blurred and merged into a definition of love. I began to believe they worked hard because they loved us, which was true, but I was never given an understanding on the multiple ways a person could be loved. Subsequently, grandpa and I began to butt heads. I never looked at/accepted his advice on taking school seriously as a form of love. I understood the opportunity I had, being his firstborn, but I didn’t understand how much it meant to him for me to make something of myself. Everything felt like an order, but in hindsight, they were all steps to success. He would tell me CONSTANTLY to save my money, but I wouldn’t listen because all the kids made fun of me for wearing Payless sneakers. Grandpa was over-protective but he had his reasons. Being an immigrant family, raising two black sons in a Urban neighborhood, was hard work.

At times, I do wish we had been able to communicate better because we truly used to go to war with one another over my love for basketball. To give you a better idea of how basketball made me feel, you could say I loved it about as much as you love your tablet, if not more. And Grandpa could not understand why I would spend every waking moment playing. He just didn’t believe that it held any value, which I is understandable because he never played or really understood the game. But at that stage of my life, he just became one of the many obstacles I had to overcome in pursuit of my goals, which ultimately made for a rocky household. If I knew then what I know now, I probably would have tried to diffuse a lot of our tension by showing him the many ways in which basketball benefited me, so that he could finally find value in it the way I did.

The biggest thing I want you to take from this is that life’s lessons will always reveal themselves — you never lose. Through my relationship with your grandpa, I’ve gained a different perspective on how to say “I love you”. “Did you eat…did you finish your homework…how was school”- they can all translate into “I love you”, you just need to be conscious of it. I understand how detrimental communication can be in a relationship now. If you can’t relay your feelings in a way the receiver can grasp it, you will have a hard time connecting with one another. His perspective has allowed me to be more versatile when it comes to raising you and more importantly, he showed me how important it is for a man to love his children.

I will mess up, I won’t always be right ( don’t tell your mom that) but I will (always) love you unconditionally.

Bye sweetheart.

1 Comment

  1. In awe of the rawness and vulnerability of your writing. All the best in your endeavours. Your content is beautiful.

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